Random Thoughts of the Day

• I don't understand the purpose of the line, "I don't need to drink to have fun." Great, no one does. But why start a fire with flint and sticks when they've invented the lighter

• The letters T and G are very close to each other on a keyboard. This recently became all too apparent to me and consequently I will never be ending a work email with the phrase "Regards" again

• How the hell are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?

• Was learning cursive really necessary

• While driving yesterday I saw a banana peel in the road and instinctively swerved to avoid it...thanks Mario Kart

• MapQuest really needs to start their directions on #5. Pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood

• There's no worse feeling than that millisecond you're sure you are going to die after leaning your chair back a little too far

• "Do not machine wash or tumble dry" means I will never wash this ever.

• I like all of the music in my iTunes, except when it's on shuffle, then I like about one in every fifteen songs in my iTunes

• Even under ideal conditions people have trouble locating their car keys in a pocket, hitting the G-spot, and Pinning the Tail on the Donkey - but I'd bet my ass everyone can find and push the Snooze button from 3 feet away, in about 1.7 seconds, eyes closed, first time every time...